With Ben and Chloe...not Justus, unfortunately. I needed to get a couple of things at the grocery store and decided it would be better to go out at 10 pm than to go out the next morning with all the kids! So, off we went, just me, Ben and Chloe. Times like this are rare. They both sat in the front seat. It was so cute. As Chloe often does, she was rubbing Benny's (as she so affectionately calls him) head and telling him "Benny, I just love you so much....I really do love you Benny...." And she does SO MUCH! So I said "ya know, Chloe, you are going to be a really great wife and love your husband alot! " "Yeah" she said, "but I am really gonna miss Benny" and I think she will. Poor Chloe. I wonder if they could get houses by eachother after they are married just so Chloe can still rub poor Benny's head????
at 8:47 AM
It hits me everyonce in a while that she is gone. Really gone. I can't pick up the phone, I can't jump in the car and go to lunch with her, I can't in any way get a hold of her...EVER! That is big. And sometimes it overwhelms me. I have cried several times today just thinking of her. Weird how I can go for months and be okay and then one day BOOM! There it is. I remember her saying that she wished she could live long enough to see Benny's first day of kindergarten. She wanted that so bad. And I specifically remember her saying that she wanted to see Christian (my niece) go to college. Christian leaves on Monday for Pensacola. She has had quite a struggle making some decisions, the same struggles I went thru at that time in my life. And I know that that coincidence wouldn't be lost on my Mom. She would know, she would understand and she would know JUST what to say to our lil' Pooder who is growing up. The saying is so true, you just don't know what you have until it's gone. So, forgive me for wallowing a bit...I just miss my Mommy! And Pooder, we are so proud of you! You are growing into a fine young lady! My heart is bursting with pride! I love you!
at 4:37 PM